The conversation starts with Kevin talking about 90s toys such as Pogs, Pokemon, Animaniacs and Tamagotchis. I am clueless about these toys as I was in college in the 90s and was focused more on Chaucer and liberal protests.
The conversation moves into the segment on what stressed us out that week. I describe my frustration with losing socks in the laundry. I know, cliche topic but where do they go? After arguing through all of the possibilities Kevin suggests the socks likely get sucked into the drum of the dryer, which makes me even more anxious as that would be a fire hazard. Kevin reminds listeners to empty the lint filter, which was a tip he learned from Karen Kilgariff on the My Favorite Murder podcast. Thanks, Karen!
Kevin shares his anxiety about getting short-changed at an ATM. I can think of a million things more likely to give me anxiety. Then it occurred to me that I actually don't count the money that I get from an ATM so maybe I have been short-changed. Not surprisingly, the discussion turns to identity theft and pharmacists.
At 14:10 into the podcast, Kevin raises his main topic: the fear of getting his contact lenses stuck behind his eyes. I don't wear contact lenses so I have not thought much about this topic but Kevin offers a compelling analysis as to why this was a real fear of his. The conversation toggles between Kevin's research and myths about cross-eyed children.
Kevin was relieved to discover that it is impossible for contact lenses to roll back behind the eyes because there is some fancy membrane that stops junk from getting back there. However, he then realizes he has a new fear of eye infections. Think about that. You can get gonorrhea, herpes, and a whole suite of other infections in your eyes. Kevin focuses on an infection called loiasis, better known as eye worms. Stay away from central Africa, which is home to the deer and mango flies - the carriers of eye worm eggs. If you ever wanted to see a picture of eye worms, check out our Instagram (TerrifyinglyB). Somehow the conversation shifts to eyelash mites. Kevin claims that 50% of the population have eyelash mites. I think it's closer to 100%. What do you think?
Shockingly, the discussion circles back to David's allergies and the plethora of medications he's taking to find relief. Tootie, Kevin's adorable Chihuahua, makes an appearance on the episode. Normally, she stays idle on her Brittany Spears pillow but she decides to stand up and make little piggy noises.
We end the conversation on uplifting topics: genocide and Elizabeth Taylor's double eyelashes. You're welcome.
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